LIFE, WELL ADJUSTED: Man on the Moon - Andy’s Man Club
“Now Andy, did you hear about this one?”
Over the last few years I’ve been aware of the Andy’s Man Club (AMC) through advertising, sponsorships and local signage, promoting the weekly meetings of the charity in whatever location I happened to be in.
Up until now it’s never got any further than just being on my radar, despite having some knowledge of the good work it promotes in Men’s wellbeing.
I found myself asking:
“Why might that be the case? What was stopping me?”
Well, growing up in the North of the UK in the 70s and 80s as a male, it was almost drilled into you, that it was not the done thing to openly show your emotions. Adopting the “stiff upper lip” was regarded as a positive trait and generally, you just got on with life and didn’t make a fuss about it.
Now, I know things have changed for the better since those times and, as a man in today’s society, we are a lot more in tune with our feelings than ever, but I’m also probably not alone amongst men my age (50-ahem-something) in not really having a network of close male friends that I would be totally comfortable sharing many of my personal feelings or emotions with.
I still find this part of life difficult and a little awkward to say the least. I’m typically introverted and wouldn’t go out of my way to discuss topics more challenging than the weather, football or latest music.
“Sometimes, I may as well be a man on the moon.”
And I don’t know of any of my acquaintances who’ve attended an AMC meeting so, coupled with my recent re-invention, I decided to investigate further, take a delve into a meeting or two, and provide some illumination on what the meetings and their “It’s okay to talk” environment can offer.
“Now Andy, did you hear about this one?”
As a native and proud West-Yorkshire man, I was surprised, but equally pleased, to find the origins of AMC can be traced back to Halifax in 2016, when Elaine Roberts and Luke Ambler established a charity as a memorial for Andrew Roberts (Elaine’s son and Luke’s brother in-law).
With no indication that he was struggling, Andrew, a 23-year old father, had tragically taken his own life.
“It highlighted a stark, sad reality that many men suffer in absolute silence.”
But from that silence, a roaring network of support was born.
From the early seeds of nine men meeting in a small room, the AMC now runs approximately 350 groups across the UK, supporting over 6,500 men every single week.
Every single club meets at exactly the same time: Mondays at 7:00 PM (except bank holidays). They are completely volunteer-led by men who originally walked through the door as meeting attendees themselves.
How the Meetings Actually Work
The weekly meetings follow a prescribed structure which helps both existing and new participants.
Expect to be greeted on arrival at 6.45pm by AMC clad facilitators directing you to the tea/coffee facilities. A biscuit helps lower any tension.
The meeting area consists of chairs arranged in a circle. A "talking ball" is passed around. You only speak when you hold the ball; if you don't want to speak, you simply pass it on. There is zero pressure.
The meeting is strictly structured around five questions. The first three are always the same:
How’s your week been?
One positive from your week?
Anything to get off your chest?
With a quick break for another brew, the mood then lightens towards the final two questions designed to be lighter, funny, or forward-looking (e.g., "What is your favourite sandwich?" or "What is a goal you're working toward?") to ensure all participants leave the room on a positive note.
The overall vibe is that “It’s okay to talk” which the questions help facilitate, though again it is also fine just to listen.
Having done some basic research I contacted AMC, explaining my intentions and the nature of what I was hoping to do, and asked whether I would be welcome at a forthcoming Monday evening meeting.
The answer from the AMC headquarters was a resounding, Stipe-esque ‘yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah’—welcoming me with open arms...
HEALTH WARNING:
“If you believed there’s nothing up his sleeve, then nothing is cool”
You will note that one of the paramount requirements around the meetings is confidentiality.
Accordingly, under AMC’s code of conduct, no-names, no pack-drill or photos or even non-attributed quotes from the meetings will ever be made.
Meeting 1: Settle, North Yorkshire AMC Meeting - Monday 1st June, 2026
With some trepidation I approached the Andy’s Man Club sign pointing its way to the local Settle CoE Primary School.
I’d gone with little idea of who, and how many people, would be in attendance, maybe expecting a handful. My expectations were quickly surpassed - from arriving at the entrance I was greeted by both the organisers and other participants with an equally warm and friendly welcome, as a steady stream of men made their way into the school hall.
An initial observation was the strong bonds that were apparent between the men arriving. Much hand shaking, hugs and rapid conversational re-entry into each other’s lives. It was clear that things quickly and seamlessly picked up from discussions of the last meetings.
Further to my contact with AMC headquarters and explaining my intentions to the organisers upon arrival, we agreed I would introduce myself before the meeting started properly.
With an audience of around 20, I gave an account of my recent journey, change of direction and current writing ‘adventure’ whilst also disclosing it was the first anniversary of going alcohol free. I stressed my adherence to the confidentiality of all matters, but noted my overall aim was to help to raise the profile of AMC both locally and more widely.
The meeting then commenced with a reminder of the participation etiquette followed by the structure and passing of a ball mentioned earlier.
I was pleased to be able to join in with this, giving an account of events within my last couple of weeks (this being the first meeting for 2 weeks, given the recent Bank Holiday, when the group doesn’t meet). It was clear that there was no pressure to say anything, a few of the guys simply passed the ball on at times, with no judgement made.
There was a good level of camaraderie throughout, much derived from the familiarity of many of the group through regular attendance since the club was established over 3 years ago. Perhaps even more importantly, there was a great level of positive feedback given as people explained some of the steps they were taking in turning things around.
The coffee break also provided a great opportunity to chat more with many of the participants. All were very open, highly complimentary of the role AMC is playing in their lives. Examples were given of some of the issues and challenges many of them had faced and how chatting about things had massively helped. It was further noted that other members had often ‘mucked in’ when circumstances required collective help, and people generally ‘had your back’.
It all felt completely natural and akin to a meeting up with some friends for a catch up. Especially with the key supporting ammunition of tea, coffee, biscuits and a job lot of some very welcome jam doughnuts that one of the members had kindly brought from work!
The 2 hours went very quickly and we were soon wrapping up the final couple of questions. Within such a short space of time it was engaging to discover much about so many people—the format of the meetings is helpful in regulating the conversation—whilst giving folks the chance to share more if they feel that is beneficial for their mindspace.
Meeting 2: Chesterfield AMC Meeting - Monday 1st June, 2026
Somewhat coincidentally, a friend and ex-work colleague of mine, David also made his first visit to an AMC meeting in Chesterfield. I thought it would be useful to stack up my visit against his.
Here is how David experienced his first night in the room:
“It had a profound impact on me. I was welcomed and was open about why I was there, to find out more and contribute.
I quickly felt a little out of place as most of the guys in there are truly up against it. My life is a dream in comparison but just through life experience I found I could empathise more than I expected.
The organisation saves lives and there was living proof sat next to me! One member was particularly fragile but he was there and looked forward to Mondays.
It was a privilege to be there Damien and I will go back, not because I need to right now but because I think I may be able to play a part constructively.
All still pretty raw.
These guys need an outlet. I think AMC is an absolute god send for many blokes who are really up against it over the length and breadth of the land.”
“Here's a little agit for the never-believer”
I’ve pivoted from my original comments about my reluctance to attend an AMC meeting to being a firm believer in their good!
Walking into Andy’s Man Club, I expected to feel like that isolated man on the moon. Instead, I found a room of gravity. There is a profound, quiet strength in watching men of all ages and backgrounds pass a ball, take a sip of tea, and lay their cards on the table. I went in as a sceptical, introverted child of the 70s with my stiff upper lip firmly intact. I left realising that talking isn't a sign of weakness—it’s the ultimate act of resilience.
I also gained enough from the meeting to encourage a return visit and I’m already looking forward to next Monday night and a chance to get to know the members even more!
Ongoing awareness and Support
It’s encouraging to see organisations in the UK raise awareness and much-needed support to AMC.
For example, Plumbing, heating and cooling specialist merchants, Wolseley Group, have recently spearheaded a support partnership with AMC, aimed at their near 6,000 strong UK workforce, customers and wider trade community.
Wolseley Group Social Media post, May 2026
Partnerships like this are vital because the industry trades are often the last places where men feel safe dropping the mask. Initiatives like this are a lifeline—a way of ensuring that whatever a man is struggling with doesn't end up permanently 'locked in the punch' of his own mind.
To find the exact venue closest to you, you can use the Group Finder directly on their website: andysmanclub.co.uk. There are online meetings also held for those without a nearby meeting location.
🚨 Please Note: Andy's Man Club is a peer-support group, not a 24/7 crisis service. If you or someone you know is in immediate distress or needs urgent help right now, please reach out to:
The Samaritans: Call 116 123 (Free, confidential, 24/7)
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably): Call 0800 58 58 58
Emergency Services: Call 999 or 111
Additional Services:
A new NHS mental health crisis service is now available – including for children in England. Call 111 and select the mental health option for support.
You can also search for local and national support services at:
www.hubofhope.co.uk
